Discipleship: Reflections on My Reflections

Reading and reflecting prompts me to ask God, what should I do? How should I live? What does this mean for me today, right now?

That was the attitude I had when I went to church yesterday morning.

All during church, I watched as people came into the room. There are so many people I don't know. I've been in this church for a year, but this church doesn't really feel like family, not like the Tierrasanta campus did when there was only one campus, and not like Santee did.

Yes, there are people I know, and yes, there are people I do consider family, but that's not quite the same.

I am not blaming the church. Instead, I am asking how I can change this. My assumption is that my church should feel like family, and given that it used to be, given that this was so life-giving in the past, I want it to be that way again. Certainly, I had some emotional/spiritual/psychological healing to do when I came to the church, but I think that's mostly done now.

I began to pray to that end during the service, and here are some ideas God brought to mind:

• Re-think my relationship with other followers of Christ. Love people, really love people, in a way that motivates me to move beyond the safe space I have created around me. 
• Open my heart and mind to meeting people, people I might not have chosen to meet. 
• Commit to ministry/service. Not really sure what ministry/service. Worship? Life group? Hospitality? I am not serving, and I have always served in some aspect. 
• Commit to hospitality. By hospitality, I mean inviting people I don't know into my home for the purpose of getting to know them. 
• Commit to a life group. I don't know if this means starting one or joining an existing one. 
• Commit to memorizing Scripture again. 

Honestly, none of this transforms my life. Only God can do that.

But it does allow me to live, abide, rest in him, so I can see, listen, and learn. 

As I do that, I will connect to the people God wants me to connect to.